Guide for a Child of an Addict

For some children, it may be difficult to fully recognize and understand if their parent is struggling with substance abuse or addiction. Depending on the age of the child, the parent may also try and hide their addiction, waiting until after they have gone to bed to use or only use when they are out of the house. If the parent is using an illicit drug, they may wait until the child is asleep to purchase or use the drug.

A parent’s substance use can have significant emotional and psychological impacts on children, leading to feelings such as:

• Guilt
• Abandonment
• Emotional withdrawal
• Behavioral issues
• Confusion (especially if their parent also has a mental illness)
• Challenges with trust and self-esteem

Some children may have behavioral problems in school or social situations because they may not have the ability to express their feelings about their home situation. Adult children of addicts may recognize these feelings over time and feel anger over how their parent’s drug abuse affected their upbringing. Children of any age may feel responsible for their parent’s addiction and will likely have a higher risk of developing drug abuse problems in their own lives.

While no child wants to see their parent struggle, being able to properly identify the signs substance abuse and addiction can be a crucial first step in getting them the help they need. Helping a parent seek addiction treatment before their addiction continues to worsen may make a major difference in their path to recovery.

If you suspect that your parent may be struggling with substance abuse or addiction, below are some common signs to be on the lookout for:

• Changes in behavior: Mood swings, irritability, or aggression
• Neglecting responsibilities: Not going to work, not keeping the house clean, not going grocery shopping, etc..
• Changes in physical appearance and personal hygiene: Not showering, looking unkempt, bloodshot eyes, drastic changes in weight, etc..
• Acting secretive: Hiding substances and/or paraphernalia, lying about using substances, frequently disappearing, etc..
• Relationship problems: Problems developing in relationships with other family members or friends due to substance use.
• Financial problems: Development of unexplained financial problems or debt that didn’t previously exist.
• Legal problems: Getting arrested or being stopped by police for drug or alcohol-related issues.

When it comes to helping a parent with addiction, seeking help outside of the home is crucial. School counselors can offer a safe space for children to express their concerns and provide guidance on accessing community resources. Support groups such as Al-Anon provide specific support for family members of individuals struggling with addiction, including children of addicted parents. Mental health professionals are also available to help children and families navigate the challenges of addiction and provide coping strategies.

Important Things to Keep in Mind with an Addicted Parent

For a child, helping a parent that is struggling with addiction can be a tough thing to navigate. After all, traditionally the parent is supposed to be the one that is there to help guide and support the child.

When attempting to help an addicted parent, it’s important to express concern and let them know that you are here to help them should they want help. It’s important to remember that you can’t make them get help if they don’t want to help themselves. Make sure and set boundaries for yourself and seek professional support and guidance to protect your overall mental health and well-being.

It’s important to avoid blaming or judging your parent for having an addiction, as addiction is a complex disease that requires empathy and understanding. But it is also important to try and avoid “bailing them out” and taking on adult responsibilities around the house, as that may enable them to feel like they can keep using without any consequences..

While it is important to be there to help and support your addicted parent, it is also important that you make sure to take care of yourself. Many people, whether children or adults, often neglect themselves when caring for and trying to help an addicted loved one. Remember that you are the child, and it’s not wrong to want to have fun or do light-hearted activities.

Adult children of drug addicts face unique challenges, including feelings of guilt and long-resonating impacts on their emotional and psychological well-being. It is crucial for them to seek help (such as in individual therapy or support groups) to cope with these lingering effects and build resilience for a healthier future.

If you are the child of an addicted parent, seeking support from a trusted individual is crucial. Watching a parent struggle with substance abuse and addiction can take a toll on a person mentally and emotionally. This person can be a friend, family member, or a mental health professional. The key is to find someone that you are comfortable talking and expressing your emotions with.