Guide for Children of An Addict

For some children, it may be difficult to fully recognize and understand if their parent is struggling with substance abuse or addiction. Depending on the age of the child, they may not have a proper understanding of what addiction is and what it looks like. The parent may also try and hide their addiction from their children, waiting until after they have gone to bed to use or only use when they are out of the house.

While no child wants to see their parent in a state of vulnerability or see them struggle, being able to properly identify the signs and symptoms of substance abuse and addiction can be a crucial first step in getting them the help they need before their addiction continues to worsen.

If you suspect that your parent may be struggling with substance abuse or addiction, below are some common signs to be on the lookout for:

• Changes in behavior: Mood swings, irritability, or aggression
• Neglecting responsibilities: Not going to work, not keeping the house clean, not going grocery shopping, etc
• Changes in physical appearance and personal hygiene: Not showering, looking unkempt, bloodshot eyes, drastic changes in weight, etc
• Acting secretive: Hiding substances and/or paraphernalia, lying about using substances, frequently disappearing, etc
• Relationship problems: Problems developing in relationships with other family memes, friends, etc due to substance abuse or addiction
• Financial problems: Noticing the development of unexplained financial problems that didn’t previously exist
• Legal problems: Getting arrested or pulled over for drug or alcohol-related issues.

When a parent is suffering from addiction, it can affect the entire household. Their addiction can not only hurt their spouse but also their children as everyone else feels as though they have to pick up the slack.

A parent that is struggling with addiction may experience impaired judgment and decision-making abilities, neglect of parental responsibilities, financial instability, and emotional instability.

Effects of Substance Abuse on Children

Unfortunately, children growing up in a household where at least one parent is suffering from substance abuse or addiction is far too common. In fact, according to the National Institute on Drug Abuse, roughly 25% of all American kids grow up in a household where substance abuse is present.

Children that grow up in a household with at least one addicted parent are more likely to experience the following issues:

• Poor performance in school
• Emotional distress
• Physical and/or emotional abuse
• Low self-esteem
• Neglect
• Social problems
• Drug or alcohol issues of their own

When it comes to helping a parent with addiction, seeking help outside of the home is crucial. For children of addicted parents, there are many options available when it comes to seeking support and guidance.

School counselors can offer a safe space for children to express their concerns and provide guidance on accessing community resources. Additionally, support groups such as Al-Anon and Nar-Anon provide specific support for family members of individuals struggling with addiction, including children of addicted parents.

Mental health professionals are also available to help children and families navigate the challenges of addiction and provide coping strategies.

Dos and Donts

For a child, helping a parent that is struggling with addiction can be a tough thing to navigate. After all, traditionally the parent is supposed to be the one that is there to help guide and support the child, not the other way around.

If you have a parent that is struggling with substance abuse and addiction, not only is important to know what to do, but it is also equally as important to know what NOT to do.

When attempting to help an addicted parent, it’s important to express concern and let them know that you are here to help them should they want help. It’s important to remember that you can’t make them get help if they don’t want to help themselves. It’s also important to make sure and set boundaries for yourself and seek professional support and guidance to protect your overall mental health and well-being.

On the flip side, it’s important to avoid blaming or judging your parent, as addiction is a complex disease that requires empathy and understanding. At the same time though, it is also important to try and avoid “bailing them out” and taking on adult responsibilities around the house as that may enable them to feel like they can keep using without any consequences.