While many people associate addiction recovery with treatment and rehab, it is just one part of a lifelong journey. While treatment is certainly an important aspect of recovery, the truth is that it is just the beginning. Some may argue that once treatment has been completed and you return to the “real world” full of temptations and triggers, that’s when the real work begins.
One crucial aspect in remaining successful in recovery after treatment is setting boundaries, both internal and external. Boundaries serve as a foundation not just for long-term sobriety, but also in maintaining control over your environment. Without clear boundaries, the risk of relapse is much higher. This is especially true if you find yourself in situations that may trigger cravings. Understanding the importance of setting boundaries in addiction recovery (as well as their significance) can make all the difference in sustaining a successful recovery.
What are Boundaries in Recovery?
As it relates to addiction recovery specifically, boundaries are personal limits that individuals set to protect their physical, emotional, and mental well-being. These limits help a person define what behaviors, situations, or relationships are supportive of their sobriety and which ones are detrimental.
It may seem like boundaries may promote isolation, but that is not the case if implemented correctly. Setting boundaries is about instituting safeguards against potential triggers and harmful influences, such as people you may have associated with when using or certain places you may have frequented.
For example, attending social events where substance use is prevalent may not seem dangerous at first. But exposure to triggers over time may erode one’s self-control. Establishing boundaries, such as avoiding such gatherings or attending only with a friend supportive of your sobriety, can make a significant difference.
In most cases, boundaries need to be a core component of a person’s relapse prevention plan. By identifying personal triggers and implementing clear rules for handling them, boundaries allow them to protect themselves from high-risk situations. It can also foster a sense of self-trust, another key component of long-term recovery.
Finally, there is the clarity and stability that boundaries create both internally and externally. Many people recovering from addiction may have experienced strained or toxic relationships in the past. Establishing clear expectations for how they wish to be treated moving forward can help them avoid falling back into harmful relationship patterns that could jeopardize their sobriety.
Types of Boundaries
Boundaries play a vital role in long-term recovery. But there are different types of boundaries that can be implemented:
Physical boundaries involve setting limits regarding physical space, personal belongings, and bodily autonomy. In recovery, maintaining physical boundaries can help keep people out of high-risk situations or situations that may trigger them and jeopardize their sobriety.
Some examples of physical boundaries include:
- Avoiding places associated with past substance use
- Declining physical contact that makes you uncomfortable
- Setting limits on personal space to ensure a sense of security
- Establishing a strict curfew or limiting time spent outside the home at night
It’s also important to remember that physical boundaries can be internal, too. Making healthy lifestyle choices, such as establishing routines around sleep, diet, and exercise can all promote overall well-being.
Mental boundaries are designed to protect your thoughts and beliefs from being manipulated or influenced in ways that undermine recovery. These boundaries allow you to differentiate your own values from the pressures of others.
Examples of mental boundaries include:
- Recognizing and rejecting negative self-talk
- Avoiding conversations that provoke self-doubt or feelings of inadequacy
- Setting limits on exposure to media or conversations that glorify substance use
- Practicing mindfulness to stay present and avoid dwelling on past regrets or future anxieties
- Developing a structured learning routine to strengthen cognitive function
A key part of successfully instituting mental boundaries is learning to say “no.” This can mean saying no to thoughts you may have or influences that don’t align with your new recovery goals. This may mean no longer following certain social media accounts or declining invitations to events where you think negative influences may be present.
Emotional boundaries are meant to help a person cope with managing emotions. Addiction often damages emotional well-being, leading to feelings of guilt, shame, and vulnerability. Establishing emotional boundaries allows a person in recovery to focus on healing without taking on the emotional burdens of others.
Examples of emotional boundaries include:
- Saying “no” without feeling guilty, whether it’s to a social gathering or a conversation that feels emotionally draining
- Limiting time spent with people who drain emotional energy, such as those who constantly criticize or bring up past mistakes
- Prioritizing self-care and emotional stability by engaging in activities that bring joy and relaxation
- Avoiding taking responsibility for other people’s emotions or choices
- Learning to identify and express feelings in a healthy way
One of the biggest challenges with setting boundaries (as well as recovery as a whole) is learning to handle emotions in a healthy and productive manner. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) helps people learn about the connections between their emotions, beliefs, actions, and outcomes. Emotional boundaries can help because it can help the person separate their feelings from those of others and establish limits on emotional involvement in stressful or toxic relationships. They can also help the person better determine and work to satisfy their personal needs, emotional and otherwise.
Spiritual boundaries involve protecting and adhere to one’s beliefs, values, and sense of purpose. In recovery, you may explore spirituality as a source of strength and healing, especially as it relates to 12-step programs and support group meetings. Setting spiritual boundaries ensures that personal beliefs are respected and not compromised.
Some common spiritual boundaries include:
- Choosing to engage with a faith or spiritual practice that supports recovery
- Avoiding discussions or influences that challenge personal convictions in a negative way
- Respecting one’s own need for reflection and spiritual growth
- Establishing a personal moral code and adhering to it
Spiritual boundaries can also involve setting time aside for personal reflection, prayer, or meditation. These practices can provide a sense of peace and purpose, reinforcing an overall commitment to recovery.
The Value of Internal Boundaries
While external values are certainly important, internal boundaries are equally as crucial to overall success in recovery. But internal boundaries often don’t receive the same level of attention that external ones do.
Internal boundaries involve self-discipline, self-respect, and self-trust. Many people struggling with addiction lose faith in themselves due to repeated relapses or broken promises. Rebuilding this trust is essential for long-term recovery.
Rebuilding Your Relationship With Yourself
Setting internal boundaries is a great way to start rebuilding self-trust. Internal boundaries promote a sense of both self-care and self-respect. By making a commitment to yourself and following through, you can restore trust within yourself.
Examples of this include:
- Sticking to a daily routine that supports recovery
- Avoiding self-sabotaging behaviors
- Setting realistic goals and holding yourself accountable
Many people in recovery struggle with self-criticism and guilt. Internal boundaries can help separate past mistakes from present progress. By treating yourself with kindness and patience, you can create a healthier mindset that supports growth rather than shame.
The Role of Self Discipline
Self-discipline is crucial in recovery, and it is a key component of relapse prevention. Without self-discipline, it’s easy to fall back into old habits that may lead to a relapse. Setting clear internal boundaries helps build the discipline necessary to resist cravings, stay committed to addiction-based recovery activities, and engage in activities that support sobriety.
Some ways in which you can instill self-discipline include:
- Creating and following a structured daily schedule
- Committing to healthy coping mechanisms, such as exercise or meditation exercises
- Setting boundaries around sleep, diet, and self-care
It’s important to remember that while building self-discipline takes time, it ultimately strengthens your ability to make choices that align with your long-term recovery goals. Developing a routine that includes positive habits can make a significant impact on your overall well-being and personal resilience.
Heal From Addiction and Set Boundaries in Addiction Recovery at Eagle Creek Ranch Recovery
Recovering from addiction is not just about quitting substances, it’s about creating a new, healthier way of life. Establishing strong boundaries is a vital step in this journey, helping individuals protect their sobriety, mental well-being, and personal growth.
At Eagle Creek Ranch Recovery, we understand the importance of boundaries in addiction recovery. Our programs are designed to help individuals identify, establish, and maintain boundaries that support lasting sobriety. Whether it’s through personalized therapy, group counseling, or holistic recovery methods, we equip individuals with the tools they need to set limits that foster self-respect and long-term success. If you or a loved one is struggling with addiction and looking for a path to lasting recovery, contact us today.
Clinical Director
Kendall Maloof is the clinical director at Eagle Creek Ranch Recovery. She is a licensed marriage and family therapist and has held multiple leadership roles before settling here at Eagle Creek. Kendall received her master’s degree in marriage and family therapy from the Chicago School of Professional Psychology in 2016. Her career in mental and behavioral health began in 2014 when she took up internships in both the nonprofit and for profit sectors. She interned at multiple reputable companies, such as The Living Success Center and 449 Recovery in California.
In 2019, Kendall became the clinical director of Sunsets Recovery for Woman, a dual diagnosis program in southern California. Kendall is a natural leader. She has an incredible ability to problem solve and stay calm in any situation. Kendall never fails to show up when she is needed, and her calm demeanor makes her team and clients feel at ease. Eagle Creek Ranch Recovery is proud to have Kendall as our clinical director.
